Foxtel

Movie Guide

Mon 23rd January

Morning

Run Fatboy Run

Five years ago Dennis was at the altar about to marry Libby, his pregnant fiancee. He got cold feet and ran for the hills and he's been going in circles ever since. When Dennis discovers Libby's hooked up with high-flying-go-getter Whit he realises it's now or never. He enters a marathon to show he's more than a quitter, but then finds out just how much sweat, strain and tears it takes to run for 26 miles. Nobody gives him a chance, but Dennis knows this is his only hope to be more than a running joke.

Mon 23rd January

Noon

Guess Who

When Theresa brings fiance Simon Green home for her parents' 25th wedding anniversary, she's neglected to mention one tiny detail - he's white. Determined to break his daughter's engagement, Percy Jones does everything he can to make Simon feel a part of the family, from running his credit report to locking him in the basement at night. But when Percy gleefully exposes Simon's most embarrassing secret, it leads to an outrageous series of comic complications that only goes to prove that with a dad like Percy Jones, father doesn't always know best.

Mon 23rd January

The Birdcage

A cabaret owner and his drag-queen partner try to transform themselves into straight shooters at a dinner party and pull the chiffon over the eyes of an uptight senator and his wife.

Mon 23rd January

Evening

The Heartbreak Kid

Single and indecisive, Eddie begins dating the incredibly sexy and seemingly ideal Lila. Fearful that it may be his last chance at love and happiness, with the encouragement of his father and his best friend, Eddie proposes to Lila after only a few weeks. However, while on their honeymoon in sunny Mexico, Lila reveals her true beyond-awful nature and Eddie meets Miranda, the woman he believes is his actual soul mate. Now Eddie must keep his new, increasingly horrid wife at bay as he attempts to woo the woman of his dreams.

Mon 23rd January

The Final Girls

A young woman mourning the loss of her mother, a famous scream queen from the 1980s, finds herself pulled into the world of her mums most famous movie. Reunited, the women must fight off the film's maniacal killer.

Mon 23rd January

Youth In Revolt

This is the story of Nick Twisp, a unique, but affable teen with a taste for the finer things in life like Sinatra and Fellini who falls hopelessly in love with the beautiful, free-spirited Sheeni Saunders while on a family vacation. But family, geography and jealous ex-lovers conspire to keep these two apart. With Sheeni's encouragement, Nick abandons his dull, predictable life and develops a rebellious alter ego: Francois. Francois will stop at nothing to be with Sheeni, and leads Nick Twisp on a path of destruction with unpredictable and uproarious consequences.

Mon 23rd January

Bye Bye Love

A trio of divorced dads cope with their single lifestyle in any number of dysfunctional ways. There are girlfriends, ex-wives and kids to juggle, all coming to a head on one life-changing weekend.

Tue 24th January

Morning

License to Drive

For teenager Les Anderson, the two most important things in life are getting his driver's license and getting together with the hottest girl in high school. But when Les fails the exam, he borrows' the family's prized '73 Cadillac for his big date. An innocent girl. A harmless drive. What could possibly go wrong? Try a fearless best friend with an insane plan, a high school hottie with too much to drink, angry drag racers, crazed militants, a police roadblock, a crash course in car theft, a very angry father, and much more.

Tue 24th January

Mischief

Set in the 1950s, this romantic comedy involves the complicated relationship between a Walter Mitty-like Jonathan and the town bad boy, Gene. Approaching Gene to ask his advice about women, Jonathan impresses him with his fearlessness over his attraction to the most popular girl in school: the flirtatious and spoiled Marilyn. Gene, on the other hand, is not quite as tough as his leather jacket would indicate. He is involved in a serious relationship with the sweet but confident Bunny, and while giving Jonathan tips on how to handle women, finds himself at a loss on how to handle his own love life. Gene has other pressing issues; most importantly, how to handle the school bully and his snotty girlfriend.

Tue 24th January

How I Got Into College

Opposites attract in this teen comedy about a slacker who goes to desperate lengths to get into the same college as his over-achieving dream girl.

Tue 24th January

Rat Race

A casino owner sets up a high-stake road race to impress his coterie of compulsive high rollers.

Tue 24th January

Blonde Ambition

The city that never sleeps is about to meet the girl that doesn't quit. Katie Gregerstitch is a small-town Oklahoma beauty who's come to New York to visit her long-term boyfriend. But after finding him in the arms of another woman, Katie decides to lose her cheating man and to find herself. With the help of two scheming co-workers, she lands a job at a top construction firm where she meets and falls for a great guy with an even greater secret. Now, nothing is going to stop this go-getter from getting exactly what her heart desires in the romantic comedy that proves you can't keep a bright, beautiful girl down.

Tue 24th January

Big Momma's House 2

FBI agent Malcolm Turner goes back undercover as slick-talking Big Momma, a Southern granny with attitude to spare.

Tue 24th January

Hot Pursuit

An uptight police officer tries to protect a wisecracking widow of a cartel informant as they race through Texas pursued by crooked cops and murderous gunmen.

Tue 24th January

Noon

Evolution

Dr Ira Kane, is a disgraced former government scientist banished to a small community college in Arizona, who tags along with his friend and colleague, geology professor Harry Block, when he's called to investigate a meteor crash site by hapless fireman wannabe Wayne. Dr Kane is the first to discover the meteor's alien stowaways and to understand the significance of their rapid development. It's impossible to keep a discovery of this magnitude under wraps, and it isn't long before the government, in the person of beautiful but all-business epidemiologist Allison, swoops in to take over. The fate of the Earth hangs in the balance as they try to control an unprecedented and unpredictable alien population explosion.

Tue 24th January

The Girl Next Door

All of a teenager's dreams come true when a former porn star moves into the house next door.

Tue 24th January

Starsky & Hutch

One of television's most popular duos heads to the big screen in this parody of the popular 1970s series. Join uptight David Starsky and laid-back Ken 'Hutch' Hutchinson as they're paired for the first time as undercover cops. The new partners must overcome their differences to solve an important case with help from street informant, Huggy Bear and persuasive criminal, Reese Feldman.

Tue 24th January

Evening

Spy

Susan Cooper is an unassuming, deskbound CIA analyst, and the unsung hero behind the Agency's most dangerous missions. But when her partner falls off the grid and another top agent is compromised, she volunteers to go deep undercover to infiltrate the world of a deadly arms dealer, and prevent a global disaster.

Tue 24th January

The Night Before

Ethan, Isaac and Chris have been friends since childhood, and for a decade, their yearly Christmas Eve reunion has been an annual night of debauchery and hilarity. Now that they're entering adulthood, the tradition is coming to an end, and to make it as memorable as possible, they set out to find the Nutcracka Ball - the Holy Grail of Christmas parties.

Tue 24th January

Rock the Kasbah

A has-been rock manager from California stumbles upon a once-in-a-lifetime voice in a remote Afghan cave in this film, a dramatic comedy inspired by stranger-than-fiction, real-life events. Richie Lanz, dumped and stranded in war-torn Kabul by his last remaining client, discovers Salima Khan, a Pashtun teenager with a beautiful voice and the courageous dream of becoming the first woman to compete on national television in Afghanistan's version of American Idol.

Wed 25th January

Morning

The Adventures of Priscilla

It's not easy being a drag queen in the outback! Resplendent in flamboyant ball gowns, looking down over the vast red Australian desert: for three showgirls, Tick, Adam and Ralph, it was the dream of a lifetime, a four week cabaret engagement in Alice Springs. The problem is simply getting there intact, along with their bus Priscilla.

Wed 25th January

Oscar

After promising his father that he'll quit his life of crime, Chicago's no.1 gangster, 'Snaps' Provolone realises it's an offer he should have refused. But, as the mobster tries to quit the rackets, everybody gets into the act - friends, family - even the Feds. Going straight will be the toughest job he's ever pulled.

Wed 25th January

Major League II

Tom Berenger and Charlie Sheen return as the Indians become World Series contenders. But their previous enthusiasm has been replaced with complacency and bad decisions by the new owner threaten to tear the team apart.

Wed 25th January

Bruno

As Bruno travels the world in search of fame, everyone he encounters - celebrities, politicians, Hasidic Jews, terrorists and cage fighters - becomes a stepping-stone to stardom, with hilarious results.

Wed 25th January

Barbershop

Calvin, who inherited the struggling business from his deceased father, views the barber shop as nothing but a burden and waste of his time. After selling the shop to a local loan shark, Calvin slowly begins to see his father's vision and legacy and struggles with the notion that he just sold it out. Calvin's barbershop is filled with an eclectic and hilarious cast of characters that share their stories, jokes, trials and tribulations. In the shop we find Eddie, an old barber with strong opinions and no customers. Jimmy is a highly educated barber with a superiority complex who can't stand Isaac, the new, white barber who just wants a shot at cutting some hair. Ricky is an ex-con with two strikes against him and is desperately trying to stay straight. Terri is a hard-edged woman who can't seem to leave her two-timing boyfriend. And lastly there's Dinka, a fellow barber who is madly in love with Terri but doesn't get the time of day.

Wed 25th January

Jackass 3

Three times the laughs, three times the stupid, three times the pain. The Jackass guys are back for their wildest round of mischief and mayhem yet. You'll laugh till your bladder pops or your spleen spleens as Johnny Knoxville, Bam Margera and the boys bring you high voltage stunts.

Wed 25th January

The DUFF

Bianca is a content high school senior whose world is shattered when she learns the student body refers to her as The DUFF (Designated Ugly Fat Friend) to her prettier, more popular friends. With her universe turned upside down, she ignores words of wisdom from her favourite teacher and enlists Wesley, a slick but charming jock, to help set her apart from the pack and erase her label forever. In doing so, she hopes to land her crush Toby, and find the confidence to overthrow the school's ruthless label maker Madison by reminding everyone that no matter what people look or act like, we are all someone's DUFF and that's totally fine.

Wed 25th January

Showtime

Laughs abound when a no-nonsense LAPD detective is forced to star in a reality-based television show with a showboating patrolman and frustrated wannabe-actor in an effort to boost the department's public image and morale. They soon find their lives turned upside-down by the show's powerhouse producer and her very intrusive camera crew!

Wed 25th January

Noon

Dirty Sanchez: The Movie

At the behest of the devil the infamous pranksters of the Dirty Sanchez troupe act out the seven deadly sins around the world. This scatological spectacle will leave you speechless.

Wed 25th January

Fired Up!

Dreading the prospect of attending another summer football camp filled with long days, hard workouts and no women, two high school football stars hatch a plot to attend their school's cheerleading camp instead. Their "summer of loving" goes according to plan until one of them falls for a beautiful and tenacious cheerleader who sees right through their charade.

Wed 25th January

Ted 2

When he is ruled to be property and not a person, a foul-mouthed teddy bear seeks the aid of a legendary civil rights attorney to gain the justice he deserves.

Wed 25th January

Evening

The Kings of Mykonos

Nick Giannopoulos stars as Steve 'The Wog Boy' Karamitsis, who inherits a beach on the Greek resort island of Mykonos from an uncle he's never met. Steve and his Italian friend Frank head over to the island with high expectations. But while Mykonos is beautiful and full of gorgeous women, his extended family is distrustful and his inheritance is under a cloud. Steve and Frank find themselves in a complicated situation with the wealthy Mahili eager to acquire Steve's beach to expand his property empire.

Wed 25th January

Bring It On

Torrance is the new leader of the Toros, the cheerleading squad of Rancho Carne High School as they're poised to take their sixth national cheer title. But her new reign is cut short when she discovers her duplicitous forerunner was regularly stealing routines from the East Compton Clovers, the hip-hop influenced cheerleaders of an inner city school. Scrambling to come up with a new routine for the Toros, she butts heads with the proud and understandably wary Isis, the leader of the Clovers, who wants to get her squad to the championships. Only one team can take home the national title. Who's it gonna be?

Wed 25th January

Four Holidays

Kate and Brad are a happily unmarried couple who avoid spending Christmas with their families at all costs and instead travel to exotic locales. But when they find themselves fogged in at the San Francisco airport and their flight to Fiji cancelled, they have no choice but to spend the holiday with their divorced parents and the rest of their dysfunctional relatives.

Wed 25th January

Waking Up in Reno

Lonnie Earl Dodd is a Little Rock car dealer who stars in his own cheesy television commercials. He and his wife Darlene are best friends with Roy and Candy Kirkendall, who are trying to start a family. When the two couples decide to drive cross-country to see a monster truck rally, an alarming secret is revealed: Lonnie Earl and Candy have been having an affair.

Thu 26th January

Morning

Top Five

Andre Allen is a former stand-up comedian and Hollywood movie star whose latest project - a serious film about the 1791 Haitian Revolution - has just been panned by the New York Times. His agent is eager to get Allen back on track, being the funny-man his fans know and love, while his fiancee is eager for him to help raise the profile of her reality TV show. With some trepidation, Allen agrees to spend the day with a whip-smart, beautiful journalist from the Times with whom he reflects on the life he left behind while ambling through various New York City boroughs.

Thu 26th January

Dirty Rotten Scoundrels

Two wiley con-men living in the south of France join forces to bilk rich American women of their fortunes. When one decides to strike out on his own, a bet is made over who can take a rich American heiress for $50,000 first. After much outrageous tomfoolery, the boys learn the heiress has no money and all three join forces.

Thu 26th January

Return of the Killer Tomatoes!

Twenty years after the original Killer Tomato Task Force rid the country of the bizarre, man-eating fruits, the evil Professor Gangreen is hard at work in his laboratory, turning tomatoes into perfect human replicas designed to help him take over the world. One night, Gangreen's beautiful replica girlfriend, Tara, flees the scientist's mansion with her fuzzy, mutant little brother, FT, and takes refuge with the pizza delivery boy, Chad. Chad and Tara fall madly in love, but jealous Gangreen wants his creation back, so he takes them all prisoner. Now Chad and Tara rely on little FT, their secret weapon, to free them and to save the world from Gangreen's deadly plan.

Thu 26th January

Big

A 14-year-old boy gets upset when he realises the girl of his dreams has an older boyfriend, and that he's not tall enough for the Whirl-A-Gig. At the edge of the carnival, he finds a Zoltar machine, a mysterious little game that promises to fulfil one's wishes. Josh requests something simple - he wants to be big. To the shock of Josh and his mother, he wakes the next morning as a 35-year-old. His best friend Billy trusts he is who he says he is after they duet on their secret song and whisks him off to Manhattan to help him track down the Zoltar machine to return to smallness. As he has to wait six weeks, it means that Josh will have to do the inevitable and get a job. He begins as a simple data clerk at MacMillan Toys but quickly becomes VP of market development and catches the eye of fellow exec Susan.

Thu 26th January

The Concierge

In this charming romantic comedy packed with laughs and heartfelt moments, a concierge at fancy hotel dreams of opening his own luxury hotel. When he finally finds an investor for the hotel, he thinks his dreams have come true - until he discovers that the investor is having an affair with the girl that he loves. Will he try to woo her away - or will he accept the money and let her fade away?

Thu 26th January

Entourage

Movie star Vincent Chase, together with his boys, Eric, Turtle and Johnny, are back - and back in business with super agent-turned-studio head Ari Gold. Some of their ambitions have changed, but the bond between them remains strong as they navigate the capricious and often cutthroat world of Hollywood.

Thu 26th January

Noon

Airheads

The Lone Rangers are a struggling Los Angeles rock band who just about has it all: the sound, the look, the attitude. But with all this going for them, The Lone Rangers can't even get arrested - until they inadvertently take a radio station hostage in an attempt to get their demo played. If they can just get their song played, surely everyone will recognise their talents, and record companies will come begging for their services.

Thu 26th January

Little Nicky

When Satan reneges on his plans to retire, two of his three heirs leave Hell for New York City to gather enough souls to vote the Prince of Darkness out of office. But Satan sends his youngest and nicest son, Little Nicky, to bring his two treacherous brothers home.

Thu 26th January

Anger Management

After a small misunderstanding aboard an aeroplane escalates out of control, timid businessman Dave Buznik is ordered by the court to undergo anger management therapy at the hands of specialist Dr Buddy Rydell. Dave reluctantly accepts the doctor's counselling, but after another mishap Buddy steps up his aggressive and unorthodox treatments by moving in with Dave. As Buddy wreaks havoc with every aspect of his life, Dave must decide whether to crawl back into his shell or finally stand up for himself. Laugh like crazy at this outrageous comedy that will drive you mad with laughter.

Thu 26th January

Billy Madison

Twenty-seven-year-old Billy Madison must repeat all 12 grades of school - in just 24 weeks - to earn his fathers respect and prove he has what it takes to run the family's multi-million dollar empire. Along the way, Billy falls for his third grade teacher, gets kicked out of school and must face-off with his nemesis - not to mention a pesky penguin.

Thu 26th January

Evening

Happy Gilmore

After his dream of stardom on the hockey ice melts, Happy Gilmore discovers he has a gift that could bring him glory on the greens. Trouble is, with his hot head and hard-hitting drives, Happy doesn't just play golf, he destroys it. With the help of a retired golfer and hot publicist, can Happy perfect his game and tame his temper to win the tournament prize money?

Thu 26th January

Fat Pizza

This Australian comedy, created by and starring Paul Fenech is based on the television series of the same name, has an irreverent look at dodgy suburban Sydney take away. We follow the misadventures of Pauly (Fenech), the pizza delivery guy, his co-workers, Sleek (Paul Nakad) and Davo (Jabba) and the psychotic pizzeria owner/pizza chef (John Boxer) who is awaiting the arrival of his mail-order refugee bride, and a new pizza deliverer is on the block.

Thu 26th January

Dumb Criminals: The Movie

Rabbit and Rongo, two dumb but kind-hearted criminals, want to help a young girl get the medical treatment she needs. Inspired by true crimes around the world, they attempt to raise money through a series of dumb plans and hopeless schemes.

Thu 26th January

Unfinished Business

A hard-working small business owner and his two associates travel to Europe to close the most important deal of their lives. But what began as a routine business trip goes off the rails in every imaginable - and unimaginable - way, including unplanned stops at a massive sex fetish event and a global economic summit.

Fri 27th January

Morning

Bye Bye Love

A trio of divorced dads cope with their single lifestyle in any number of dysfunctional ways. There are girlfriends, ex-wives and kids to juggle, all coming to a head on one life-changing weekend.

Fri 27th January

National Lampoon's Movie Madness

Outrageously funny! Scandalously shocking! And did we mention the stripper? National Lampoon spoofs the hell out of life as we know it in three eye-widening, knee-slapping and mum-offending movies combined into one hysterical whole. An arrogant corporate lawyer forces his wife to leave him so that he can find what's been missing from his life and the mania begins. A victimised stripper vows to take over the world and mayhem sets in. Two mismatched cops search for a deranged serial killer and madness completely takes over. Individually, each movie will shock your senses. But together, they'll blow you away.

Fri 27th January

Now Add Honey

After her sister is suddenly sent to rehab, Caroline is forced to look after her movie star niece, Honey.

Fri 27th January

Overboard

A snooty socialite falls from her yacht and develops amnesia, and a grubby carpenter convinces her they're married and takes her home to meet their kids.

Fri 27th January

Austin Powers: Man of Mystery

Frozen in the '60s, secret agent Austin Powers is thawed back into action to once again battle his archenemy Dr Evil. With his sexy sidekick Ms Kensington, Austin must stop Dr Evil's outrageous plot to control the world. But first, this time-warped swinger must get hip quick and discover that there's no free love in the '90s. Shagadelic baby!

Fri 27th January

The Hangover Part III

The third and final film in the record-shattering comedy franchise. This time, there's no wedding. No bachelor party. What could go wrong, right? But when the Wolfpack hits the road, all bets are off.

Fri 27th January

City Slickers

Thirty-nine-year-old New Yorker Mitch Robbins is tired of his job and bored with his life. So he and his two best friends trade their briefcases for saddle bags and set out to find freedom and adventure herding cattle under the wide New Mexico sky. But what they discover instead is scorching sun, sore backsides ... and more about themselves and each other than they ever thought possible.

Fri 27th January

Noon

The Pink Panther

When a star soccer coach is murdered and his priceless Pink Panther diamond stolen, France is in an uproar. Fortunately, Inspector Jacques Clouseau is on the case. He doesn't have a clue, but for Clouseau, that's just a minor detail. With his partner, Gilbert Ponton, he careens from one misadventure to the next, leaving mayhem in his wake from the boulevards of Paris to the streets of New York. Will he seduce the pop diva, Xania? Will he push Chief Inspector Dreyfus over the edge? Will he catch the killer and recover the diamond? With Inspector Clouseau, anything is possible. A stunning pop star, a soccer player, a Chinese assassin - who committed the crime? And can anyone solve the case? Clouseau and his partner, Ponton, must unmask the murderer and keep their boss, Dreyfus, from taking credit for the victory, all without bringing the French legal system to a screeching halt. Get ready to be tickled pink!

Fri 27th January

Jackass Number Two

For fans who thought the stakes couldn't be raised any higher and the bar couldn't be lowered any further, the original cast and crew of the stunt comedy sensation that swept the globe return for another round of jaw-dropping feats that are guaranteed to have viewers wincing through their laughter. The boys return to the screen to endure more pain and humiliation than ever thought possible on the big screen.

Fri 27th January

She's Out of My League

Twenty-something Kirk Kettner works at the Pittsburgh airport and still hangs out with his high school buddies and co-workers, Jack, Stainer and Devon and imagines getting back together with his ex-girlfriend, Marnie, who has long since moved on. All in all, Kirk seems content to simply maintain the status quo - until the day Molly sashays through his security checkpoint at the airport and accidentally leaves her cell phone behind. Molly is smart, sophisticated, devastatingly beautiful and completely out of Kirk's league. When Kirk returns the phone as a courtesy, she offers to repay the favour with a pair of hockey game tickets, and he accepts, never thinking for one second that this dream girl is asking him out on a date.

Fri 27th January

Evening

Whip It

Bliss and her best friend Pash live in the tiny Texas town of Bodeen. They dream of growing up and getting out. Bliss is pressured by her mother to participate in beauty pageants. She also feels like a misfit at school. So Bliss takes a chance and tries out for a roller derby team in Austin. She pushes herself and makes the team, which is called the Scouts. She finds that, despite the violence and aggression of the game, she really loves it. She is also very good.

Fri 27th January

Ali G Indahouse

White boy in da 'hood, Ali G, disses everything from politicos to pimps in this feature-length expansion of his hit TV Series. Conned by a scheming MP (Charles Dance), into running for the Staines bi-election - but me is not bi! - Ali has the last laugh when his "keep it real" campaign wins the vote and the heart of Me Julie (Kellie Bright).

Fri 27th January

Cuban Fury

In 1987 a 13-year-old natural born dancer with fire in his heels and snakes in his hips is working himself up to explode all over the UK Junior Salsa Championships. But then a freakish bullying incident on the mean streets of London robs him of his confidence, and our young hero finds his life diverted down a very different path. Twenty-two years later, an adult Bruce Garrett finds himself out-of-shape and unloved, trapped in a downward spiral of self-pity, repression and Nando's take-outs. Only Julia, his smart, funny, gorgeous new American boss, gives him reason to live. But she's untouchable, out of his league. Luckily for him, she also has a secret passion. Thus, Bruce is once again brought face-to-face with the darkest and most powerful of his inner demons. Somehow, someway, Bruce must learn how to unshackle his dancing beast, regain his long lost fury and claim the love of his life and he's going to do it all on the dance floor.

Fri 27th January

Big Momma's House 2

FBI agent Malcolm Turner goes back undercover as slick-talking Big Momma, a Southern granny with attitude to spare.

Sat 28th January

Morning

Dinner for Schmucks

Tim is a rising executive who succeeds in finding the perfect guest, IRS employee Barry, for his boss's monthly event, a so-called dinner for idiots, which offers certain advantages to the exec who shows up with the biggest buffoon.

Sat 28th January

Major League: Back to the Minors

What do you do if you're the new manager of the minor-league team called the Buzz? Pray for rain. Instead, Gus Cantrell turns his team from a laughingstock to the equivalent of blue-chip stocks in this third Major League comedy reuniting five series stalwarts, including wisecracking play-by-play man Bob Uecker. Cantrell has his work cut out. The catcher is living proof why the chest protector and other protective gear are called the tools of ignorance. The ace pitcher should earn frequent-flyer miles for the fastballs opposing batters sock into orbit. The double-play combo's motto should be to error is human. The star slugger is a legend in his own mind. They play on diamonds. They work for peanuts. Batter up.

Sat 28th January

50/50

Inspired by a true story, this is an original story about friendship, love, survival and finding humour in unlikely places. Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Seth Rogen star as best friends whose lives are changed by a cancer diagnosis in this new comedy directed by Jonathan Levine from a script by Will Reiser. This is the story of a guy's transformative and, yes, sometimes funny journey to health - drawing its emotional core from Will Reiser's own experience with cancer and reminding us that friendship and love, no matter what bizarre turns they take, are the greatest healers.

Sat 28th January

The Three Stooges

Left on a nun's doorstep, Larry, Curly and Moe grow up finger-poking, nyuk-nyuking and woo-woo-wooing their way to uncharted levels of knuckleheaded misadventure. Out to save their childhood home, only The Three Stooges could become embroiled in an oddball murder plot...while also stumbling into starring in a phenomenally successful TV reality show.

Sat 28th January

We're the Millers

David Burke is a small-time pot dealer whose clientele includes chefs and soccer mums, but no kids - after all, he has his scruples. So what could go wrong? Plenty. Preferring to keep a low profile for obvious reasons, he learns the hard way that no good deed goes unpunished when he tries to help out some local teens and winds up getting jumped by a trio of gutter punks. Stealing his stash and his cash, they leave him in major debt to his supplier, Brad. In order to wipe the slate clean - and maintain a clean bill of health - David must now become a big-time drug smuggler by bringing Brad's latest shipment in from Mexico. Twisting the arms of his neighbours, cynical stripper Rose and wannabe customer Kenny, and the tatted-and-pierced streetwise teen Casey, he devises a foolproof plan. One fake wife, two pretend kids and a huge, shiny RV later, the 'Millers' are headed south of the border for a Fourth of July weekend that is sure to end with a bang.

Sat 28th January

I Love You, Man

A comical tale that explores what's at the core of male friendship and what it truly means to be a friend. Peter Klaven is a successful real estate agent who, upon getting engaged to the woman of his dreams, Zooey, discovers to his dismay that he has no male friends close enough to serve as his best man. Peter immediately embarks on a series of bizarre and awkward man-dates to find such a friend. He meets Sydney Fife, a fun-loving, charismatic man, Peter's opposite, with whom he instantly bonds. But the closer the two men get, the more Peter's relationship with Zooey suffers, ultimately forcing him to choose between his fiancee and his newfound friend.

Sat 28th January

Ali G Indahouse

White boy in da 'hood, Ali G, disses everything from politicos to pimps in this feature-length expansion of his hit TV Series. Conned by a scheming MP (Charles Dance), into running for the Staines bi-election - but me is not bi! - Ali has the last laugh when his "keep it real" campaign wins the vote and the heart of Me Julie (Kellie Bright).

Sat 28th January

Noon

The Final Girls

A young woman mourning the loss of her mother, a famous scream queen from the 1980s, finds herself pulled into the world of her mums most famous movie. Reunited, the women must fight off the film's maniacal killer.

Sat 28th January

My Super Ex-Girlfriend

A needy superhero unleashes her powers on her ex-boyfriend after he dumps her, making his life a living misery and messing with him.

Sat 28th January

Spy

Susan Cooper is an unassuming, deskbound CIA analyst, and the unsung hero behind the Agency's most dangerous missions. But when her partner falls off the grid and another top agent is compromised, she volunteers to go deep undercover to infiltrate the world of a deadly arms dealer, and prevent a global disaster.

Sat 28th January

Evening

Duplex

Young and vibrant New Yorkers Alex and Nancy have just found the perfect place to settle down and share a bright future. But their new home comes with a permanent fixture they didn't expect: an obnoxious elderly tenant who won't move out and refuses to die! Pushed to the edge of insanity as their dream home turns into a nightmare, it's only a matter of time before Alex and Nancy begin to entertain some truly sinister solutions to their problem.

Sat 28th January

Pitch Perfect 2

Beca, Fat Amy and the Barden Bellas are back to pitch slap the world. After a scandal threatens to derail their last year at Barden, the three-time defending champs worry that they've lost their harmony for good. With one chance left at redeeming their legacy, they must they must face off against the toughest competition on the planet: German supergroup Das Sound Machine and fight for their right to win at the World Championships of A Cappella. It will take the power of sisterhood to find their voice and see what it takes to be the world's top pitches.

Sat 28th January

Trainwreck

Since she was a little girl, it's been drilled into Amy's head by her rascal of a dad that monogamy isn't realistic. Now a magazine writer, Amy lives by that credo, enjoying what she feels is an uninhibited life free from stifling, boring romantic commitment but in actuality, she's kind of in a rut. When she finds herself starting to fall for the subject of the new article she's writing, a charming and successful sports doctor named Aaron Conners, Amy starts to wonder if other grown-ups, including this guy who really seems to like her, might be on to something.

Sun 29th January

Morning

Gun Shy

When the post-traumatic stress of a failed sting operation nearly causes a mental and physical breakdown, legendary undercover agent Charlie finds himself relying on an unstable therapy group, and attracted to the even more unstable nurse Judy. While falling in love with someone nicknamed 'enema queen' is risky enough, Charlie is also living in mortal fear of his latest target, the trigger-happy Mafia leader Fulvio. Can Charlie keep himself together long enough to survive one last assignment - so that he can retire, fall in love and go truly crazy?

Sun 29th January

A Very Harold & Kumar Christmas

Following years of growing apart, Harold and Kumar embark on another ill-advised journey through NYC where their search takes them through party heaven - and almost blows Christmas Eve sky high.

Sun 29th January

Blonde Ambition

The city that never sleeps is about to meet the girl that doesn't quit. Katie Gregerstitch is a small-town Oklahoma beauty who's come to New York to visit her long-term boyfriend. But after finding him in the arms of another woman, Katie decides to lose her cheating man and to find herself. With the help of two scheming co-workers, she lands a job at a top construction firm where she meets and falls for a great guy with an even greater secret. Now, nothing is going to stop this go-getter from getting exactly what her heart desires in the romantic comedy that proves you can't keep a bright, beautiful girl down.

Sun 29th January

Waking Up in Reno

Lonnie Earl Dodd is a Little Rock car dealer who stars in his own cheesy television commercials. He and his wife Darlene are best friends with Roy and Candy Kirkendall, who are trying to start a family. When the two couples decide to drive cross-country to see a monster truck rally, an alarming secret is revealed: Lonnie Earl and Candy have been having an affair.

Sun 29th January

Showtime

Laughs abound when a no-nonsense LAPD detective is forced to star in a reality-based television show with a showboating patrolman and frustrated wannabe-actor in an effort to boost the department's public image and morale. They soon find their lives turned upside-down by the show's powerhouse producer and her very intrusive camera crew!

Sun 29th January

Youth In Revolt

This is the story of Nick Twisp, a unique, but affable teen with a taste for the finer things in life like Sinatra and Fellini who falls hopelessly in love with the beautiful, free-spirited Sheeni Saunders while on a family vacation. But family, geography and jealous ex-lovers conspire to keep these two apart. With Sheeni's encouragement, Nick abandons his dull, predictable life and develops a rebellious alter ego: Francois. Francois will stop at nothing to be with Sheeni, and leads Nick Twisp on a path of destruction with unpredictable and uproarious consequences.

Sun 29th January

Homegrown

There's no partnership like a joint partnership, especially for Jack, Carter and Harlan, three inexperienced players looking to score some fast cash in the high-stakes world of dope dealing. The three work as pot farmers who make easy money tending a vast Northern California crop owned by an oddball marijuana maven named Malcolm. But when Malcolm turns up dead, the three budding businessmen, along with their gal-pal Lucy, come to the half-baked conclusion that they can handle the distribution of the marijuana themselves. Soon the trio finds themselves in the company of crooked cops, duplicitous dealers, Mafia hitmen, and homicidal helicopter pilots in their crazed quest to cash in their crop.

Sun 29th January

Jackass 3

Three times the laughs, three times the stupid, three times the pain. The Jackass guys are back for their wildest round of mischief and mayhem yet. You'll laugh till your bladder pops or your spleen spleens as Johnny Knoxville, Bam Margera and the boys bring you high voltage stunts.

Sun 29th January

Noon

The Cable Guy

Chip Douglas, a cable installer raised on television sitcoms, he wants life to look just like My Three Sons. And when he meets single guy Steven Kovacs, he sees his chance for some serious male bonding. But Chip's idea of friendship - which includes physical assault, a game of 'Porno Password' and a medieval joust - may be hazardous to Steven's health. In Chip's own immortal words, "I can be your best friend... or your worst enemy."

Sun 29th January

Run Fatboy Run

Five years ago Dennis was at the altar about to marry Libby, his pregnant fiancee. He got cold feet and ran for the hills and he's been going in circles ever since. When Dennis discovers Libby's hooked up with high-flying-go-getter Whit he realises it's now or never. He enters a marathon to show he's more than a quitter, but then finds out just how much sweat, strain and tears it takes to run for 26 miles. Nobody gives him a chance, but Dennis knows this is his only hope to be more than a running joke.

Sun 29th January

The Watch

Four everyday suburban guys come together as an excuse to escape their humdrum lives one night a week. But when they accidentally discover that their town has become overrun with aliens posing as ordinary suburbanites, they have no choice but to save their neighbourhood, and the world, from total extermination.

Sun 29th January

Evening

Bring It On

Torrance is the new leader of the Toros, the cheerleading squad of Rancho Carne High School as they're poised to take their sixth national cheer title. But her new reign is cut short when she discovers her duplicitous forerunner was regularly stealing routines from the East Compton Clovers, the hip-hop influenced cheerleaders of an inner city school. Scrambling to come up with a new routine for the Toros, she butts heads with the proud and understandably wary Isis, the leader of the Clovers, who wants to get her squad to the championships. Only one team can take home the national title. Who's it gonna be?

Sun 29th January

The Dictator

Admiral General Shabazz Aladeen is the fiercest dictator in all of North Africa, ruling the great Republic of Wadiya and risking his life to ensure that democracy never reaches the nation he so lovingly oppressed. However, he faces the ultimate culture clash when he decides to pay visit to the United States.

Sun 29th January

Pixels

As kids in the 1980s, Sam Brenner, Will Cooper, Ludlow Lamonsoff, and Eddie 'The Fire Blaster' Plant saved the world thousands of times - at 25 cents a game in the video arcades. Now, they're going to have to do it for real. When intergalactic aliens discover video feeds of classic arcade games and misinterpret them as a declaration of war, they attack the Earth, using the video games as the models for their assaults, and now, US President Cooper must call on his old-school arcade friends to save the world from being destroyed by PAC-MAN, Donkey Kong, Galaga, Centipede, and Space Invaders. Joining them is Lt Col Violet Van Patten, a specialist supplying the arcaders with unique weapons to fight the aliens.

Sun 29th January

Bringing Down the House

A straight-laced lonely guy meets a woman on the Internet who happens to be in prison, breaks out to be with him, and proceeds to wreak havoc on his middle-class life.

Mon 30th January

Morning

I'm Still Here

Oscar-nominated actor Casey Affleck in his directorial debut together with fellow Oscar-nominee Joaquin Phoenix blow the roof off of conventional filmmaking in this unique and ground-breaking experimental project. Joaquin gives a powerful performance as JP, an out of control Hollywood celebrity who commits career suicide in announcing that he is 'retiring' from acting, while at the top of his game, to become a hip-hop star. JP shuts himself off from the protection and better judgment of his agent, manager and publicist, and sets out on a jaw-dropping journey into a decadent frenzy of sex, drugs and outrageousness, as he tries desperately to break away from his old celebrity persona to develop his rap career. Mired in self-doubt and harsh criticism from the media, he struggles to find his identity.

Mon 30th January

Funny People

When famous comedian George Simmons is given a second chance at a new beginning, he and his assistant, a struggling comedian, Ira, return to the places and people that matter most including the stand-up spots that gave him his start and the girl that got away.

Mon 30th January

The Producers

Scheming producer Max Bialystock and his mousy accountant, Leo Bloom, discover that under the right circumstances they could make more money by producing a Broadway flop than they can with a hit. But what will they do when their sure-to-offend musical becomes a surprise sensation?

Mon 30th January

Rat Race

A casino owner sets up a high-stake road race to impress his coterie of compulsive high rollers.

Mon 30th January

Austin Powers in Goldmember

Austin Powers is called to action again when his father is kidnapped by his arch enemy Dr Evil and the mysterious Goldmember.

Mon 30th January

Noon

The Kings of Mykonos

Nick Giannopoulos stars as Steve 'The Wog Boy' Karamitsis, who inherits a beach on the Greek resort island of Mykonos from an uncle he's never met. Steve and his Italian friend Frank head over to the island with high expectations. But while Mykonos is beautiful and full of gorgeous women, his extended family is distrustful and his inheritance is under a cloud. Steve and Frank find themselves in a complicated situation with the wealthy Mahili eager to acquire Steve's beach to expand his property empire.

Mon 30th January

Chef

Chef Carl Casper suddenly quits his job at a prominent Los Angeles restaurant after refusing to compromise his creative integrity for its controlling owner, he is left to figure out what's next. Finding himself in Miami, he teams up with his ex-wife, his friend and his son to launch a food truck. Taking to the road, chef Carl goes back to his roots to reignite his passion for the kitchen - and zest for life and love.

Mon 30th January

Bruno

As Bruno travels the world in search of fame, everyone he encounters - celebrities, politicians, Hasidic Jews, terrorists and cage fighters - becomes a stepping-stone to stardom, with hilarious results.

Mon 30th January

Evolution

Dr Ira Kane, is a disgraced former government scientist banished to a small community college in Arizona, who tags along with his friend and colleague, geology professor Harry Block, when he's called to investigate a meteor crash site by hapless fireman wannabe Wayne. Dr Kane is the first to discover the meteor's alien stowaways and to understand the significance of their rapid development. It's impossible to keep a discovery of this magnitude under wraps, and it isn't long before the government, in the person of beautiful but all-business epidemiologist Allison, swoops in to take over. The fate of the Earth hangs in the balance as they try to control an unprecedented and unpredictable alien population explosion.

Mon 30th January

Evening

Bloodsucking Bastards

When an office worker at a soul-crushing company loses his coveted promotion to his long-time nemesis, he begins to fear for more than his job as strange disappearances and bizarre deaths suggest the office is turning into a haven for the undead.

Mon 30th January

Jackass: The Movie

The title says it all when Johnny Knoxville and his merry band of stuntsters bring their extreme routine to the big screen, which includes guest spots from Spike Jonze and Tony Hawk. Those mystified by the non-stop barrage of self-destructive sight-gags need look no further than the skate culture from which Knoxville and his post-pubescent posse emerged: slam sections - footage of guys hitting concrete and living to tell the tale - are a skateboard video standard. Just remember: it's funny because it's true.

Mon 30th January

Semi-Pro

This is an outrageous comedy set in 1976 against the backdrop of the maverick ABA, a fast-paced, wild and crazy basketball league that rivalled the NBA and made a name for itself with innovations like the three-point shot and slam dunk contest. Jackie Moon, is a one-hit wonder who used the profits from the success of his chart-topping song, 'Love Me Sexy', to achieve his dream of owning a basketball team. But Moon's franchise, the Flint Michigan Tropics, is the worst team in the league and in danger of folding when the ABA announces its plans to merge with the NBA. If they want to survive, Jackie and the Tropics must now do the seemingly impossible: win.

Mon 30th January

Big Momma's House

An FBI agent disguises himself as the outsized mother of an escaped convict's ex-girlfriend to make an arrest. But convincing everyone he's the real deal is a real drag.

Tue 31st January

Morning

How I Got Into College

Opposites attract in this teen comedy about a slacker who goes to desperate lengths to get into the same college as his over-achieving dream girl.

Tue 31st January

The Hangover Part III

The third and final film in the record-shattering comedy franchise. This time, there's no wedding. No bachelor party. What could go wrong, right? But when the Wolfpack hits the road, all bets are off.

Tue 31st January

Fanboys

It's 1998 and Star Wars fan boys across the globe eagerly await the release of Episode 1: The Phantom Menace. But for Eric, Linus, Hutch and Windows the term "fanboy" is just more than a title, it's a badge of honour. Travelling west across the country to visit their Mecca - George Lucas Skywalker Ranch - the plan is to break in, steal the film and stake the claim as the first fanboys in history to watch it. But to secure their place in the fanboys hall of fame, they'll have to contend with bizarre bikers, a crazy pimp, a deranged group of Trekkies, and the quiet intensity of William Shatner.

Tue 31st January

Major League II

Tom Berenger and Charlie Sheen return as the Indians become World Series contenders. But their previous enthusiasm has been replaced with complacency and bad decisions by the new owner threaten to tear the team apart.

Tue 31st January

Dinner for Schmucks

Tim is a rising executive who succeeds in finding the perfect guest, IRS employee Barry, for his boss's monthly event, a so-called dinner for idiots, which offers certain advantages to the exec who shows up with the biggest buffoon.

Tue 31st January

The Birdcage

A cabaret owner and his drag-queen partner try to transform themselves into straight shooters at a dinner party and pull the chiffon over the eyes of an uptight senator and his wife.

Tue 31st January

Duplex

Young and vibrant New Yorkers Alex and Nancy have just found the perfect place to settle down and share a bright future. But their new home comes with a permanent fixture they didn't expect: an obnoxious elderly tenant who won't move out and refuses to die! Pushed to the edge of insanity as their dream home turns into a nightmare, it's only a matter of time before Alex and Nancy begin to entertain some truly sinister solutions to their problem.

Tue 31st January

Noon

Whip It

Bliss and her best friend Pash live in the tiny Texas town of Bodeen. They dream of growing up and getting out. Bliss is pressured by her mother to participate in beauty pageants. She also feels like a misfit at school. So Bliss takes a chance and tries out for a roller derby team in Austin. She pushes herself and makes the team, which is called the Scouts. She finds that, despite the violence and aggression of the game, she really loves it. She is also very good.

Tue 31st January

City Slickers

Thirty-nine-year-old New Yorker Mitch Robbins is tired of his job and bored with his life. So he and his two best friends trade their briefcases for saddle bags and set out to find freedom and adventure herding cattle under the wide New Mexico sky. But what they discover instead is scorching sun, sore backsides ... and more about themselves and each other than they ever thought possible.

Tue 31st January

Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star

Bucky Larson, a small town grocery bagger, going nowhere in life - until he discovers that his conservative parents were once adult film stars! Armed with the belief that he has found his destiny, Bucky packs up and heads out to LA, hoping to follow in his parents' footsteps.

Tue 31st January

Evening

The Concierge

In this charming romantic comedy packed with laughs and heartfelt moments, a concierge at fancy hotel dreams of opening his own luxury hotel. When he finally finds an investor for the hotel, he thinks his dreams have come true - until he discovers that the investor is having an affair with the girl that he loves. Will he try to woo her away - or will he accept the money and let her fade away?

Tue 31st January

Black Knight

Jamal is a motor-mouthed mini-golf course employee who wakes up in 14th century England after a knock to the head. There he finds time to get jiggy with some men-in-tights in between leading a rebellion and wooing the ladies.

Tue 31st January

Old School

Three men relive their carefree college years by killing off as many brain cells as possible in this over-the-top comedy. Mitch returns home from a less-than-pleasant business trip one evening to discover his wife, Heidi, involved in a menage a trois with two blindfolded strangers. Feeling less than welcome at home after this, Mitch rents a house near the campus of a nearby college; two of Mitch's old college buddies, Beanie and Frank, stop by to cheer him up. They soon become regular guests at Mitch's place.

Tue 31st January

Jackass Number Two

For fans who thought the stakes couldn't be raised any higher and the bar couldn't be lowered any further, the original cast and crew of the stunt comedy sensation that swept the globe return for another round of jaw-dropping feats that are guaranteed to have viewers wincing through their laughter. The boys return to the screen to endure more pain and humiliation than ever thought possible on the big screen.

Wed 1st February

Morning

Big

A 14-year-old boy gets upset when he realises the girl of his dreams has an older boyfriend, and that he's not tall enough for the Whirl-A-Gig. At the edge of the carnival, he finds a Zoltar machine, a mysterious little game that promises to fulfil one's wishes. Josh requests something simple - he wants to be big. To the shock of Josh and his mother, he wakes the next morning as a 35-year-old. His best friend Billy trusts he is who he says he is after they duet on their secret song and whisks him off to Manhattan to help him track down the Zoltar machine to return to smallness. As he has to wait six weeks, it means that Josh will have to do the inevitable and get a job. He begins as a simple data clerk at MacMillan Toys but quickly becomes VP of market development and catches the eye of fellow exec Susan.

Wed 1st February

Mischief

Set in the 1950s, this romantic comedy involves the complicated relationship between a Walter Mitty-like Jonathan and the town bad boy, Gene. Approaching Gene to ask his advice about women, Jonathan impresses him with his fearlessness over his attraction to the most popular girl in school: the flirtatious and spoiled Marilyn. Gene, on the other hand, is not quite as tough as his leather jacket would indicate. He is involved in a serious relationship with the sweet but confident Bunny, and while giving Jonathan tips on how to handle women, finds himself at a loss on how to handle his own love life. Gene has other pressing issues; most importantly, how to handle the school bully and his snotty girlfriend.

Wed 1st February

License to Drive

For teenager Les Anderson, the two most important things in life are getting his driver's license and getting together with the hottest girl in high school. But when Les fails the exam, he borrows' the family's prized '73 Cadillac for his big date. An innocent girl. A harmless drive. What could possibly go wrong? Try a fearless best friend with an insane plan, a high school hottie with too much to drink, angry drag racers, crazed militants, a police roadblock, a crash course in car theft, a very angry father, and much more.

Wed 1st February

Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey

Attention all righteous dudes and babes! Bill and Ted are back and better than ever with a most triumphant sequel. Everything's excellent for everyone's favourite surf-speaking dudes. With their own apartment, a pair of bodacious princess babes and a spot on the upcoming Battle of the Bands, life couldn't be any better. But all that goes down the tubes when Bill and Ted's evil robot twins kill the San Dimas duo and then take over their lives! Replaced on Earth by the bogus robots, the real Bill and Ted embark upon a most unwanted expedition - straight to Hell. Now, their only hope is to give the Grim Reaper a wedgie, and then challenge him to the ultimate death match of all time. But can Bill and Ted cheat death, save the world from evil, rescue the princess babes and be back in time to win the Battle of the Bands? Or will their heinous metal twins change the duo's destiny forever?

Wed 1st February

Nurse Betty

Betty never misses an episode of her favourite soap opera A Reason to Love. After a mind-altering run-in with two hit-men while watching an episode, Betty transforms in to "Nurse Betty" and embarks on a mission to find her one true love, Dr David Ravell. Follow Betty on a wild and hysterical cross-country trek in search of the man of her dreams. But, can Betty find him before the hit-men find her?

Wed 1st February

Men at Work

With little respect for their superiors, and even less for the law, two garbage collectors have made trouble a way of life. Practical jokers with a gift for the truly twisted gag, our two pranksters glide through work with one eye on the ladies and other on the surf shop they dream of owning one day. Their fun-loving lives turned upside down when they discovered the corpse of a local politician and realise that they will be prime suspects. Pursued by both the police and the real killers, they know that to save their lives they'll have to solve the crime.

Wed 1st February

Better Living Through Chemistry

A small town pharmacist's uneventful life is turned inside out when a chance encounter with a lonely trophy wife turns into a walk on the wild side in this murderously funny dark comedy. Doug Varney is the model of suburban respectability - until the night he delivers a prescription to the home of Elizabeth Roberts. Gorgeous, seductive and multiply addicted, Elizabeth eagerly introduces Doug to extra-large martinis, uninhibited bedroom behaviour and the illicit pleasures of the pharmacopeia he has access to in his store.

Wed 1st February

Noon

Rock Star

A copier repairman moonlights as the lead singer of a heavy-metal tribute band.

Wed 1st February

Holy Man

Ricky Hayman is praying for a miracle that will lift the network's lousy ratings and save his job. Then, from out of nowhere, 'G' walks into his life. An outrageous, self-styled inspirational guru with a knack for showing up where he isn't exactly wanted, 'G' proceeds to wander in front of the cameras just long enough to exude the irresistible star quality that will make him the sales-boosting saviour Ricky's network has been looking for.

Wed 1st February

A Few Best Men

A comedy about a groom and his three best men, who travel to the Australian outback for a wedding. When English lad David announces he is getting married to an Australian, his hapless mates give a whole new meaning to the phrase "for better or worse".

Wed 1st February

Evening

Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo

A professional fish tank cleaner, Deuce finds himself in desperate need of cash to quickly repair the damage he's done to a client's luxurious apartment. The fun really takes off when Deuce decides the only way out of this jam is to switch to the world's oldest profession and offer his services as a lover for hire.

Wed 1st February

Land of the Lost

A has-been scientist, Dr Rick Marshall, gets more than he bargained for when his expedition takes a wrong turn into the Land of the Lost. Now, Marshall, his crack-smart research assistant Holly and a redneck survivalist named Will, have no weapons, few skills and questionable smarts to survive in a world full of marauding dinosaurs, fantastic creatures and laugh-out-loud comedy.

Wed 1st February

Down to Earth

After dying before his time, an aspiring comic gets a second shot at life by being reincarnated as a wealthy but unlikeable businessman.

Wed 1st February

Project X

Three seemingly anonymous high school seniors as they attempt to finally make a name for themselves. Their idea is innocent enough let's throw a party that no one will forget; but nothing could prepare them for this party. Word spreads quickly as dreams are ruined, records are blemished and legends are born.

Thu 2nd February

Morning

Sucker

After destroying his dreams of a medical degree by cheating on his high-school exams, a teenager is sent to the country where he gets involved with a conman and his cynical daughter.

Thu 2nd February

Seven Psychopaths

When his not-all-there friends kidnap a crime boss's beloved Shih Tzu, a struggling screenwriter finds himself tangling with the kind of blood-crazed psychos he usually only writes about.

Thu 2nd February

Rock of Ages

The story of small town girl Sherrie and city boy Drew, who meet on the Sunset Strip while pursuing their Hollywood dreams. Their rock 'n' roll romance is told through the heart-pounding hits of Def Leppard, Joan Jett, Journey, Foreigner, Bon Jovi, and more.

Thu 2nd February

The Pink Panther

When a star soccer coach is murdered and his priceless Pink Panther diamond stolen, France is in an uproar. Fortunately, Inspector Jacques Clouseau is on the case. He doesn't have a clue, but for Clouseau, that's just a minor detail. With his partner, Gilbert Ponton, he careens from one misadventure to the next, leaving mayhem in his wake from the boulevards of Paris to the streets of New York. Will he seduce the pop diva, Xania? Will he push Chief Inspector Dreyfus over the edge? Will he catch the killer and recover the diamond? With Inspector Clouseau, anything is possible. A stunning pop star, a soccer player, a Chinese assassin - who committed the crime? And can anyone solve the case? Clouseau and his partner, Ponton, must unmask the murderer and keep their boss, Dreyfus, from taking credit for the victory, all without bringing the French legal system to a screeching halt. Get ready to be tickled pink!

Thu 2nd February

Joe Somebody

Everybody wants to be somebody, and Joe Scheffer is no exception. But Joe feels like he's a nobody. He regularly has been passed over for a promotion, and Joe is faring no better in his personal life still pining for ex-wife Callie. Joe then loses his cherished personal parking space at the hands of the office bully, Mark, who humiliates Joe in front of his daughter, Natalie. The incident spurs Joe to embark on a quest for redemption - or at the very least a rematch with Mark.

Thu 2nd February

Napoleon Dynamite

Napoleon lives with grandma, big brother who cruises chat rooms for pick-ups, and a pet llama. At school he helps his friend win a popularity contest from a mean teen.

Thu 2nd February

Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny

Actors/musicians Jack Black and Kyle Gass bring their infamous rock duo Tenacious D to the screen! The hilarious story of how 'The D' became the self-proclaimed greatest band on earth follows the pair's plan to steal a supernatural guitar pick on display in a rock 'n' roll museum in order to create a masterpiece song that will cement their place in music history.

Thu 2nd February

Noon

Take Me Home Tonight

An entertaining blast of 80s nostalgia, this charming comedy takes place during one raucous Labor Day party in 1988 when a recent college graduate, accompanied by his twin sister and best friend, pursues the girl of his dreams.

Thu 2nd February

Stranger Than Fiction

Harold Crick is a lonely IRS agent whose mundane existence is transformed when he hears a mysterious voice narrating his life. With the help of Professor Jules Hilbert, Harold discovers he's the main character in a novel-in-progress and that the voice belongs to Karen Eiffel, an eccentric author famous for killing her main characters in creative ways. Harold must quickly track down Eiffel and stop her before she conjures up a way to finish him off.

Thu 2nd February

Cuban Fury

In 1987 a 13-year-old natural born dancer with fire in his heels and snakes in his hips is working himself up to explode all over the UK Junior Salsa Championships. But then a freakish bullying incident on the mean streets of London robs him of his confidence, and our young hero finds his life diverted down a very different path. Twenty-two years later, an adult Bruce Garrett finds himself out-of-shape and unloved, trapped in a downward spiral of self-pity, repression and Nando's take-outs. Only Julia, his smart, funny, gorgeous new American boss, gives him reason to live. But she's untouchable, out of his league. Luckily for him, she also has a secret passion. Thus, Bruce is once again brought face-to-face with the darkest and most powerful of his inner demons. Somehow, someway, Bruce must learn how to unshackle his dancing beast, regain his long lost fury and claim the love of his life and he's going to do it all on the dance floor.

Thu 2nd February

Evening

Bedazzled

Elliot Richards, a well-meaning but socially inept technical support advisor who is in love with Alison Gardner, a female co-worker. Unfortunately, she barely knows he's alive. Desperate to gain Alison's affections, Elliot strikes a deal with the devil - a lusty, drop-dead gorgeous woman with, as hell soon discover, a wicked sense of humour. In exchange for Elliot's soul, the temptress will grant him seven wishes. Elliot is learning the hard way to be careful what he wishes for. The devil, always a step ahead of him, is dishing up hilariously subversive versions of Elliot's desires, turning each of his new lives into a living hell.

Thu 2nd February

The Promotion

At 33, Doug Stauber is ready for a promotion. He's married, wants to buy a house, and is assistant manager at a Chicago supermarket that's building a new store in his neighbourhood. His boss tells him he's a shoe-in to manage the new store, but a rival appears - Richard Wehlner, transferred from Canada. Richard has a deeper resume than Doug, is really nice, has a wife and daughter, and wants the promotion to manager, too. How should Doug behave toward Richard: as a friend, a colleague, a competitor, or an enemy? Richard, it seems, has demons and a past, but with the help of motivational tapes, he's resolved to succeed.

Thu 2nd February

American Pie

You'll never look at warm apple pie the same way again. This film takes a hysterical look at the goal of four 'unlucky in love' high school friends who make the ultimate pact: lose their virginity by prom night. As they try to manipulate their way into the hearts of some of their classmates, their plans often backfire with hilarity. Follow the raging hormones of four teenage boys and their girls as they gear up for the most important night of their lives the prom.

Thu 2nd February

The Big White

A quirky black comedy centred on Paul Barnell, a down on his luck Alaska travel agent who's on the brink of bankruptcy and whose beloved wife, Margaret, is on the brink of insanity. So what's a nice guy with good intentions but bad business sense to do? The answer lies frozen in a dumpster outside of Barnell Great Escapes - a dead body Paul hopes to pass off as his long-lost brother Raymond and then collect on the life insurance. Unfortunately, investigator Ted Watters who's anxious to transfer back to the lower 48 with his girlfriend, isn't about to let Barnell walk away with a million bucks. Adding to Paul's avalanche of problems are two aspiring hit men-turned-kidnappers and the stunning return of the supposedly dead Raymond, who now has an axe to grind with his brother. Desperation is running high in the 'big white', and if Paul is smart, he'll blow the snow, take the money and run to South America.

Fri 3rd February

Morning

Dirty Rotten Scoundrels

Two wiley con-men living in the south of France join forces to bilk rich American women of their fortunes. When one decides to strike out on his own, a bet is made over who can take a rich American heiress for $50,000 first. After much outrageous tomfoolery, the boys learn the heiress has no money and all three join forces.

Fri 3rd February

L.A. Story

LA television's Wacky Weather presenter Harris Telemacher strives to find happiness, or at least a date, in the manic chaos that is Los Angeles.

Fri 3rd February

The Woman in Red

Shy, quiet Teddy Pierce wanted a little adventure. And one day it walked into his life in a red silk dress. Now his wife is packing a gun. His friends are going nuts trying to cover for him and he's about to get caught with his pants down on the six o'clock news. Be very careful of what you want - because you just might get it.

Fri 3rd February

Death to Smoochy

Kids love him. TV execs adore him. Sheesh, it's enough to make out-of-work kiddie-show host Rainbow Randolph puke purple. Ever since that plush, fuchsia-hued, platitude-spouting Smoochy the Rhino started Jiggy Ziggy-dancing in Randolph's time slot, he has just one mad goal: turn the rhino into a dead duck. Say nite-nite, rhino.

Fri 3rd February

Macgruber

Only one operative has been awarded 16 purple hearts, and only one guy is man enough to still sport a mullet. In the 10 years since his fiancee was killed, special op MacGruber has sworn off a life of fighting crime with his bare hands. But when he learns his country needs him to find a nuclear warhead that's been stolen by his sworn enemy, MacGruber teams up with his trusty sidekick and an uptight lieutenant to get the job done. The trio sets out on a rampage of utter destruction in this action comedy that's over-the-top.

Fri 3rd February

Funny People

When famous comedian George Simmons is given a second chance at a new beginning, he and his assistant, a struggling comedian, Ira, return to the places and people that matter most including the stand-up spots that gave him his start and the girl that got away.

Fri 3rd February

Noon

The Promotion

At 33, Doug Stauber is ready for a promotion. He's married, wants to buy a house, and is assistant manager at a Chicago supermarket that's building a new store in his neighbourhood. His boss tells him he's a shoe-in to manage the new store, but a rival appears - Richard Wehlner, transferred from Canada. Richard has a deeper resume than Doug, is really nice, has a wife and daughter, and wants the promotion to manager, too. How should Doug behave toward Richard: as a friend, a colleague, a competitor, or an enemy? Richard, it seems, has demons and a past, but with the help of motivational tapes, he's resolved to succeed.

Fri 3rd February

Joe Dirt

Ditched by his parents as a child, Joe Dirt has had to raise himself. Now grown up and working as a janitor Joe sets out to find the parents who abandoned him. Along the way, he befriends a high school janitor, an alligator trainer, the beautiful but untouchable Brandy, and Robby, Joe's rival for her attention. Eventually Joe makes his way to Los Angeles, where a shock-jock brings him on his radio show to make fun of him. But as Joe recounts his story, listeners are captivated, and an entire city starts to tune in daily to hear the adventures of Joe Dirt. Soon audiences worldwide join to help this unlikely hero unearth the mystery of his family's disappearance, with startling results.

Fri 3rd February

Little Nicky

When Satan reneges on his plans to retire, two of his three heirs leave Hell for New York City to gather enough souls to vote the Prince of Darkness out of office. But Satan sends his youngest and nicest son, Little Nicky, to bring his two treacherous brothers home.

Fri 3rd February

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang

A petty thief posing as an actor is brought to Los Angeles for an unlikely audition and finds himself in the middle of a murder investigation.

Fri 3rd February

Evening

The Campaign

When long-term congressman Cam Brady commits a major public gaffe before an upcoming election, a pair of ultra-wealthy CEOs plot to put up a rival candidate and gain influence over their North Carolina district. Their man: naive Marty Huggins, director of the local Tourism Centre. At first, Marty appears to be the unlikeliest possible choice but, with the help of his new benefactors' support, a cutthroat campaign manager and his family's political connections; he soon becomes a contender who gives the charismatic Cam plenty to worry about. As Election Day closes in, the two are locked in a dead heat, with insults quickly escalating to injury until all they care about is burying each other, in this mud-slinging, back-stabbing, home-wrecking comedy.

Fri 3rd February

BASEketball

A hilarious take on the sports genre. Featuring more jokes than you can poke a stick at, this tale is about a couple of guys who invent a game "where guys with bad knees and bad backs can compete with athletes hopped up on steroids". The game is a combination of basketball and baseball with plenty of outrageous gags thrown in and a romantic subplot.

Fri 3rd February

Happy Gilmore

After his dream of stardom on the hockey ice melts, Happy Gilmore discovers he has a gift that could bring him glory on the greens. Trouble is, with his hot head and hard-hitting drives, Happy doesn't just play golf, he destroys it. With the help of a retired golfer and hot publicist, can Happy perfect his game and tame his temper to win the tournament prize money?

Fri 3rd February

Man of the Year

Tom Dobbs is a comedian who made it to the top by telling it like it is. When he decides to run for president to unleash his trademark comic rants on the powers that be, something extraordinary happens - he wins.

Sat 4th February

Morning

Modern Problems

Max Fielder is a frazzled air-traffic controller who finds himself blessed with telekinetic powers when a nuclear dump truck spills some slimy green matter on him whilst he's driving home from work. Max uses this power for revenge and ends up with some bizarre problems.

Sat 4th February

Married to the Mob

When Angela Demarco learns that her husband, a mob hit man, has been murdered she decides to break away from the influence of the Family. Her troubles are multiplied when her husband's boss, Tony 'The Tiger' Russo takes a liking to her, now she has unwittingly becomes involved in an FBI plan to arrest the mafia boss with the help of the agent who has been secretly following her.

Sat 4th February

Pieces of April

April Burns has never been on good terms with her mother, Joy, but in a burst of goodwill she's volunteered to host her family for Thanksgiving at the Lower East Side apartment she shares with her boyfriend, Bobby. As if preparing a holiday feast isn't pressure enough, she discovers her oven is broken and has to search her building for one that works, making appeals to an eclectic array of neighbours. Meanwhile, the Burns family is speeding down the highway towards New York while recounting April's failures. April's father, Jim, is determined to have a nice day, but Joy persists in undermining his plans. While perfect daughter Beth reminds everyone of her sister's faults and Grandma Dottie can barely remember anyone's name, youngest child Timmy dodges emotional bullets by photographing every awkward moment. This film is a poignant and funny look at a day in the life of a family striving to create new memories while making peace with the old.

Sat 4th February

The Birdcage

A cabaret owner and his drag-queen partner try to transform themselves into straight shooters at a dinner party and pull the chiffon over the eyes of an uptight senator and his wife.

Sat 4th February

Head of State

When Washington desperately needs a presidential candidate just weeks before the election, they need someone sure to lose. They pick Mays Gilliam, an unknown local politician from a down-and-out DC neighbourhood to be their puppet. But if Mays is going to run, he's going to have fun. He's bringing in brother Mitch, a hard-core bail bondsman, as his running mate and turning his campaign into party central. Now, Gilliam's gaining in the polls and on his way to making history.

Sat 4th February

Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo

A professional fish tank cleaner, Deuce finds himself in desperate need of cash to quickly repair the damage he's done to a client's luxurious apartment. The fun really takes off when Deuce decides the only way out of this jam is to switch to the world's oldest profession and offer his services as a lover for hire.

Sat 4th February

American Pie

You'll never look at warm apple pie the same way again. This film takes a hysterical look at the goal of four 'unlucky in love' high school friends who make the ultimate pact: lose their virginity by prom night. As they try to manipulate their way into the hearts of some of their classmates, their plans often backfire with hilarity. Follow the raging hormones of four teenage boys and their girls as they gear up for the most important night of their lives the prom.

Sat 4th February

Noon

Old School

Three men relive their carefree college years by killing off as many brain cells as possible in this over-the-top comedy. Mitch returns home from a less-than-pleasant business trip one evening to discover his wife, Heidi, involved in a menage a trois with two blindfolded strangers. Feeling less than welcome at home after this, Mitch rents a house near the campus of a nearby college; two of Mitch's old college buddies, Beanie and Frank, stop by to cheer him up. They soon become regular guests at Mitch's place.